I was excited when I heard that Mr. Cheney had hired Paul O'Neill to be his man-secretary who keeps track of treasure. Who wouldn't be? He was a real life baseball player!
One day, after one of the meetings where we talk about cabinets, I asked him if he'd teach me how to hit a slider, but he just laughed at me. That made me so mad that I wanted to call him a turd blossum. But I wanted him to teach me how to hit a slider even more, so I offered to let him use my NyQuil bong instead. He told Mr. Rove about it and I got grounded from going to play at Dan Quayle's house for a whole week.
Now, Mr. O'Neill is telling everyone that he thought I was blind in the meetings about cabinets. I bet that's why he didn't want to teach me how to hit a slider.
He might be right about me being blind, because I never see any cabinets at those meetings. Don't tell anyone about it though. They might blame it on the NyQuil.
Mr. Rove is really mad at him because he said that. I guess people don't like it when you're blind at those meetings because you might not put the doors on the cabinet right. It's sure made everyone mad at me. People are being very mean to me on the street.
Mr. Rove says that he's going to put Mr. O'Neill in jail for barrasing me. I hope so. Mr. He really is a big fat fibbing turd blossum. .